Snipe.Net Geeky, sweary things.

Portuguese Road Signs

P

If you weren’t already aware, my husband and I moved to Portugal this year. You can learn more about that on our Portuguese blog – that one documents the logistics and emotions behind the journey, the pitfalls and the victories – but has a little less of my snark, since it’s meant to help people, not necessarily make them laugh.

At any rate, one of the (many, many) things that terrifies me here is driving, especially where I live in Lisbon. The streets are impossibly narrow and twisty, often dead-ending or switching from a one-way in one direction to a one-way in the other direction without much (if any) warning.

BUT, eventually I’m probably going to have to drive here, so I figured I should probably know some (ideally all, really) of the road signs. Many of them are quite similar to the ones in the U.S., but some are hilariously hard to guess, and others just make me laugh. I thought I’d share a few of my favorites from this super useful guide here.

Danger! Bees!
Look at this fucking belt! I am so cool
WARNING! Tiny aliens will attack your car with lasers
Pizza ahead
Pervy old lady zone
Tesla-only zone
This dapper dude needs some googly eyes
Snakes following the car!
It’s called DRIVING, not diving
Tee-hee!
When your boner has a boner
Shark says HUG ME!!
The last Beatle crosses Abbey Road ahead
Strapless bras only
No, seriously, your car WILL explode
Cross-fit zone
No ska zone
Elysium ahead
No jellyfish allowed
Absolutely NO fucking cows
I HAZ A ANGRIES

About the author

snipe

I'm a tech nerd from NY/CA now living in Lisbon, Portugal. I run Grokability, Inc, and run several open source projects, including Snipe-IT Asset Management. Tweet at me @snipeyhead, skeet me me at @snipe.lol, or read more...

By snipe
Snipe.Net Geeky, sweary things.

About Me

I'm a tech nerd from NY/CA now living in Lisbon, Portugal. I run Grokability, Inc, and run several open source projects, including Snipe-IT Asset Management. Tweet at me @snipeyhead, skeet me me at @snipe.lol, or read more...

Get in Touch